Child's Play and Toys

by Linda M. Manning, RN, LPC-S, RPT-S
Registered Nurse
Licensed Professional Counselor-Supervisor
Registered Play Therapist-Supervisor

Children use play as an expressive language. It is a means of expression of what they experience and what they are exploring. Play is a central activity of childhood and is universal and natural to all children. It occurs at all times and in all places. Play also facilitates both physical and psychological development. Play crosses all language and ethnic barriers. If play is a language, then toys are like words.

Toys symbolically express what a child is experiencing or thinking. They give the child a way to communicate more complex feelings and ideas than they may be able to do with words. Children are more comfortable with symbolic expression through play, stories and pretend games than they are with sitting down and “talking it out”. Adults are comfortable sitting down to discuss a situation or issue at length. Children are not. Plato said “You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation.” This symbolic language can reveal what a child has experienced, the reactions and feelings to those experiences, what the child wishes, wants and needs and the child’s perception of self and others.

What kinds of toys are best for children? In the holiday season there are long lines and parents getting up very early in the morning to get THE toy that is all the rage. Children are influenced very easily by the commercials they watch. Up until the age of 8 years, children do not distinguish between commercials and entertainment programming. Advertisers know very well how to instill a desire to have a certain toy. They also know that parents want to please their children and see their joy on Christmas morning. Love and gift giving are interconnected in our minds. Too often; however, that perfect toy is abandoned after a short time and something else needs to take its place. But I digress. What types of toys are beneficial and useful to children in terms of development and symbolic expression through play?

Toys that the child can manipulate or use their own imagination with are toys that benefit growth and development the most. Electronic toys and games may be fun, but they do not afford the child any expression of their own imagination or creativity. Toys that require batteries and have an on-off switch will limit the child’s use of imagination, especially if the toy only does one thing when switched on. Toys that are spin-offs of movies or cartoons are also limiting for the child’s expression because the child will “play out” the movie or the role of that toy instead of imagining their own scenarios. This is not always the case; however, the tendency is to re-enact the character as it is in the movie or cartoon.

Toys can be classified into different categories, such as aggressive toys, nurturing toys, role-play or fantasy and mastery toys. Toys and spontaneous play are helpful for children to explore their environment, learn to problem solve, increase their creativity and flexibility and is a window to the child’s inner world. So there is purpose to child’s play and it’s also lots of fun!

Ruth Hartley, who co-authored The Fundamentals of Social Psychology with her husband, said, “To read the language of play is to read the hearts and minds of children.” Observing child’s play that is driven by the child, is like listening to them express their inner thoughts. Keep in mind that it is natural to play out many different types of themes and types of play that are developmentally normal. When choosing toys for your child, think about what your child can do with the toy, not what the toys does to entertain the child. Giving them a selection of toys that can be used to express a variety of emotions and experiences is useful. In addition, providing too many toys is overwhelming and not productive to the child’s development and well-being.